oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
