youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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