the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
