I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Randomize
