whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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