xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
