Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
