All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i dont even know how to be here
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
