____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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