The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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