White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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