Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
