I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
