Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
