Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
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mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
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The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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