I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
