She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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