I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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