The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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