you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
