Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
