Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems