Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
His hands were made for my vagina.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted