well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize