Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
