I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Having a random hookup so left but love u
I puked a lego.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
We need to rekindle our bromance
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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