Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
