You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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