I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
