bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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