i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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