I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
