That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
