Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
