I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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