They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
