she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
