Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
