We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
