I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
