My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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