Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you http://tfl.nu/rx95
  Replies (11) Good night (1216) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (562): Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar http://tfl.nu/ilql
  Replies (6) Good night (780) Bad night (2275)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot http://tfl.nu/fwe0
  Replies (9) Good night (3878) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do? http://tfl.nu/tx29
  Replies (46) Good night (8770) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse. http://tfl.nu/5mjb
  Replies (8) Good night (4620) Bad night (976)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location http://tfl.nu/jdkq
  Replies (16) Good night (9472) Bad night (1236)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred. http://tfl.nu/3k1m
  Replies (11) Good night (3748) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved. http://tfl.nu/qswh
  Replies (7) Good night (3832) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL http://tfl.nu/qlmv
  Replies (4) Good night (2961) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets. http://tfl.nu/5i0f
  Replies (7) Good night (6128) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside. http://tfl.nu/56u9
  Replies (21) Good night (4158) Bad night (1289)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation" http://tfl.nu/vmn5
  Replies (10) Good night (3563) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (432): Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever. http://tfl.nu/tyrw
  Replies (9) Good night (779) Bad night (2023)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick. http://tfl.nu/ynec
  Replies (15) Good night (2209) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape http://tfl.nu/bk86
  Replies (1) Good night (758) Bad night (951)

Randomize