never play flip cup with pint glasses
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
