Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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