your thong is hanging out like whoa
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
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She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
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HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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