Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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