Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
