I feel great
I just peed on a car
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
