I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
You need Xanax blowdarts
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
