38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
