i permit you to call me
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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